PGA Tour veteran Gary Woodland revealed on Monday that he has battled post-traumatic stress disorder related to the brain surgery he underwent two-and-a-half years ago.
The September 2023 operation addressed a lesion and halted his seizures. Woodland, the 2019 US Open champion, returned to the tour the following January and has played regularly ever since, but not all has been well.
"I can't waste energy anymore hiding this, and I'm blessed with a lot of support out here on the Tour," Woodland, 41, said in an emotional interview with Golf Channel.
"Everyone's just been amazing. Every week I come out and everyone's so excited and happy that I'm back. I hear that every week – it's so nice to see you past this, it's so nice to see you 100 per cent – and I appreciate that love and support. But inside, I feel like I'm dying, and I feel like I'm living a lie."
Woodland illustrated his struggles by discussing an incident at an event in Napa, California, last fall.
Woodland was triggered by a tournament staffer walking near him on the golf course.
"I stepped aside, I pulled my caddie and said, 'This stuff is hitting me, man. You can't let anybody get behind me,'" Woodland said. "Next thing you know, I couldn't remember what I was doing. My eyesight started to get blurry. And a hole later, I just said (to my caddie) ... 'I can't handle it.' And I start bawling in the middle of the fairway. It was my turn to hit, and I couldn't hit."
His caddie said to Woodland, "Let's go in," but Woodland decided to keep playing because he was competing with two members of the US Ryder Cup team for which he was about to serve as an assistant captain.
"I said, 'No, man, I'm here for these guys. I want to fight through this,'" Woodland said. "I went into every bathroom to cry the rest of the day. When I got done, I got in my car and got out of there.
"There are days when it's tough – crying in the scoring trailer, running to my car just to hide it. I don't want to live that way anymore."
Woodland said of discussing his mental-health issues, "I hope somebody that's struggling sees me out here still fighting and battling and trying to live my dreams. I've talked to veterans, and one thing I've heard from multiple people is you can't do this on your own, no matter how strong you think you are. ...
"I want to help people, too. I realise now I've got to help myself first – and hopefully this is the first step in doing that."
Woodland has four career wins on the PGA Tour, none since his US Open victory 5 1/2 years ago. Last year he had one top-10 finish, a tie for second at the Texas Children's Houston Open, and he wound up 72nd in the FedEx Cup standings.